Duly fussed at by my son

I have been fussed at my by son for not updating. We have had so many things going on that by the end of the day I just fall into bed. I think we are finally finished with the house. We still have some small things to do, but for the most part it is finished. I have made some pictures and will post them. I do not recommend the last 6 months to anyone. When I look back over the months since April, I now think I should have stepped back before doing anything. It seems to me now that grief has come even stronger. I can't think about Keith or look at pictures without crying. I'm mad at God and can't even go to church. Sometimes I feel like I am having a total breakdown. All I want is my husband and my life back and I know that isn't going to happen. Stores are putting Christmas up and I just want to hide under the covers and not even think about it. It wasn't suppose to be this way. I feel that I am only a half now. There is a part of me missing and my heart hurts. I dread the weekends and nights. I wonder if I will ever be happy again. I just don't understand why God took a good man like Keith away from us. It hurts for his children and grandchildren. As I sit here typing this, I am cryomg again. Funny, I have almost stopped putting makeup on since I know I will ruin it anyway.

Yesterday, Heidi and Roy came by. They were on their way to Missouri and took a detour to see us. It was great and I needed Heidi's hugs. We are coming to Atlanta next week and are going to stay with her some of the time. She said she is going to have me digging in the yard. We are looking forward to seeing Kevin and Lisa. We will stay with them a couple of nights.

Well, as promised to my son, Ihave updated and I hope you enjoy the pictures