Please understand this isn't what I wanted at all. I wanted Keith to be at home with us, but God in his wisdom has taken the decision out of my hands. The best place for Keith right now is at the hospice. I spoke with the nurses and they think he needs the 24/7 care, so he will stay there. I hope that everyone understands that I am doing what is right for Keith and no one else. He continues to slip in and out of conscious. Yesterday, I was laying beside him and he put his arm around my back and rubbed my back. Also, I was holding his hand and I slipped his wedding ring off (he has lost so much weight that I was afraid he would lose it), he waved his hands like NO, put it back on. So, I feel I get little pieces of him. Most of the time he doesn't response at all.
I'll post more later when I have more of my thoughts together.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
This Is not What I Wanted
Posted by
Suzan and Christopher Hallam
at
4/01/2008 07:59:00 AM
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3 comments:
What matters right now is that you are doing everything you can to keep him comfortable and take care of him. Don't spend anymore of your precious time fretting about having to put him in an inpatient facility. You are right, God puts you where you need to be, and maybe He feels that you need to just love on Keith and let others keep track of his health. I could see glimpses of Brian right up to the end, and I am most happy that I was with him.
Sending many prayers your way today for peace.
Jenni
Suzan and family,
I am Tammy's aunt (Bryce Brown). I have been thinking about you a lot lately and now I know why. My love and prayers are with you at this time. I'm so sorry the end is near for Keith. He has put up a very valiant fight and has beaten the odds many times over the past year. If I can do anything for you, please let me know. I'll continue praying for your family, as I continue praying for Tammy and Dani. May God bless you through the coming days.
Elaine Miles
Tempe, Arizona
Suzan,
This is one of Jenni Halley's sisters writing from Maryville, MO. I check in on your blog every day and pray for your strength during this trying time. I know that Keith going to a hospice facility is not your first choice, but him falling down the stairs would not be good either. So many well-meaning people try to give advice and until you have witnessed it first hand we don't really have any right to give such advice. I knew in my heart that Jenni and Brian had discussed everything, ever detail of what might happen and how they would respond to it. Jenni did what was best for Brian just like you are doing for Keith. No matter what anyone else says, please know that there are many more our here in cyberspace who understand that you do have Keith's best interest at heart. We know you will continue to be his voice during this battle. You have to be okay physically and mentally as well and having outside help is NOT a sign of weakness, but rather a sign of strength, that you are willing to do the best for Keith no matter what. Your last post sounded like you were getting hit with some questions about the hospice facility and I just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you as you had to make that difficult decision. Hugs from afar, Karis Morrow
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